Is Childhood Trauma Or Abuse Making It Hard To Feel Truly Present In Your Life?

Did you grow up in a tumultuous, chaotic, or abusive family?

Consequently, do you experience recurrent periods of anxiety or depression that seem to arise out of nowhere?

Do you feel numb or empty inside, making it difficult for you to identify or access your emotions?

Maybe you feel frozen inside and guarded around others. You don’t feel safe, nor do you trust others easily. Instead, you often feel disconnected from anyone and anything around you. It appears that you have lots of relationships, but most of them lack substance and emotional closeness. You’ve tried to create deep and meaningful connections, but it leads to nothing. Perhaps past hurt holds you back from reaching out and sharing. Sadly, you feel alone and distant around others. Can you relate to any of these experiences? If so, then maybe you’re thinking it’s time to connect with a trauma therapist.

Deep Down, You Know That Something Isn’t Quite Right

Perhaps you question how your current struggles are connected to painful childhood experiences, but you can’t quite recall any clear or specific trauma. You just know something doesn’t feel right. Maybe a recent break up has brought your attention to certain relational experiences and patterns that continuously result in a sense of confusion or chaos you’ve known all too well since you were a child. You might ask yourself, “Wait….what just happened?”

Amid conflict in your relationship, you can’t find the words to express yourself. You don’t know how to stop it. It just keeps happening. Deep down, you feel shame, embarrassment, self-doubt, and fear of rejection. These relational experiences bother you a lot! You are starting to recognize how some kind of past trauma needs to be addressed so you can live a fulfilling life.

If this is how you feel, then just maybe you’ve found a potentially good fit. At New Insights Psychotherapy Center, I specialize in helping people heal from the past and take back the power that trauma took away. It’s my hope to help you break free from these emotional experiences and relational patterns that bring you suffering so you can create a future that is no longer defined by trauma.

Trauma Is All Around—Inside Of Us And Out

We tend to think of more obvious events in life such as environmental disasters, major accidents, or an expected medical diagnosis as traumatic experiences. Yet there are more subtle experiences in life that can be just as equally impactful. These events take place right in our families when we are young, vulnerable, and unable to fully grasp what’s going on around us.

According to a report conducted by the CDC, about 64 percent of Americans have experienced at least one Adverse Childhood Experience, or ACE. These experiences don’t have to be violent or earth-shattering. For example, growing up with a clinically depressed parent, or amongst a family that discourages any emotional expression other than happiness, can also carry its own kind of trauma.

For many people, therapy marks the beginning of coming to terms with the effects of a painful childhood. It also starts the emotional journey of healing from trauma as one explores just how these experiences have impacted one’s life.

Many Trauma Survivors Know That Something’s Wrong, But Aren’t Sure How To Fix It

Oftentimes, clients will come to me saying things like, “I want to feel less fearful and more confident and passionate about life but I don’t know how to do that.” Or, “I want to be more emotionally intimate with my spouse, but I’m not sure how to make that happen.”

This reflects a truth that is essential for anyone looking to heal from trauma: sometimes knowing what to do isn’t enough. On paper, it’s easy to know the surface answers to our problems. But in everyday life, we often act in ways that are contrary to what we know to be right. We communicate in less-than-healthy ways, close the door on new opportunities before they arise, and get into relationships with people whom we know aren’t great for us.

The beauty of counseling is that it can help you dig beneath surface solutions and uncover the deeper trauma patterns that are controlling your life.

Therapy Can Help You Heal From Trauma And Achieve Inner Peace

If you’re sitting on the fence about seeking help, it’s worth asking yourself: what have you got to lose? Taking that courageous first step isn’t easy, but for so many of my clients, an enormous weight is lifted off of them when they first get support.

After all, the only way out is to walk through it—there’s truly nothing more healing than processing the trauma and finally releasing it. Doing so can empower you to increase your self-worth, connect with your true purpose, and attain inner peace.

That said, I know talking about trauma isn’t easy. Remember this process is an emotional journey requiring a lot of courage and resilience. That’s why I will help you develop valuable and effective skills to stay grounded and centered as you process the pain of the past. This way, you’ll be able to dig deep into the heart of your challenges without feeling overwhelmed or dysregulated.

What To Expect In Trauma Therapy Sessions

The work I do in therapy is highly reflective and falls within the psychodynamic framework, drawing mostly from psychoanalytic psychotherapy and Mentalization-Based Treatment. I will work with you to get to a place where you’re able to slow down and really notice what’s happening in your mind and body. Sometimes, if I observe you dissociating or drifting off, I may stop and ask:

How do you feel right now?
If you feel stressed, where you do feel that in your body?
What happens when you focus on the part of your body that feels most activated?

In time, this process of asking questions allows you to enter a more reflective mode of being. Instead of shutting down or becoming reactive, you’ll learn to sit with, understand, and process your trauma. This can help you release your stress and find healthier ways to respond to life’s challenges, setting you up for a future where you’ll:

Enjoy more satisfying relationships
Feel more connected to your emotions
Overcome feelings of low self-worth
Return to a state of wholeness and inner peace

Most importantly, therapy can help you create a life that isn’t defined by trauma—one where hope is present over fear, confidence triumphs over shame and guilt, and old triggers melt away in the face of newfound hope and healing.

You May Have Some Questions About Trauma Therapy…

How long will trauma therapy take?

If you’re reading this page, it probably means you’re longing for change. You’re tired of feeling the same way all the time and you want more meaningful connections in your life. And if you truly desire change in your heart, it can absolutely happen.

That said, length of time is unique to everyone. Some clients need therapy short-term, while others stay in it for the long haul. I advise you to go at whatever pace is right for you, understanding life is about ongoing discovery and self-growth, not instant relief.

If therapy can’t undo the past, what’s the point of even going?

You’re right, you can’t erase your painful experiences. But therapy isn’t about forgetting or eliminating trauma—it’s about recognizing it and making peace with it. As a result, you find new ways to integrate it into your life in a healthy and meaningful way. In essence, you experience post-traumatic growth instead of post-traumatic stress. Rather than me telling you to move on from trauma, my role as your counselor is to help you move forward—acknowledging (and in some cases even grieving) what was lost and embracing what is yet to come.

What if talking about trauma makes me feel worse?

Looking within is no easy process. My guess is you probably already feel enough hurt and grief from whatever your experience has been. At the same time, it’s important to know that working through emotional pain in therapy is not the same as living with it on your own. As a trained mental health professional, I can work with you to develop real-life tools for managing your stressors so that you do not feel overwhelmed in session.

You Don’t Have To Keep Living In The Shadow Of The Past

Trauma therapy is an emotional journey. It is about breaking out of old patterns and reclaiming the sense of power and fulfillment that you had before any trauma occurred. If you want to start your healing journey today, I encourage you to fill out the contact form. I look forward to working with you!