Are You Struggling To Build Meaningful Connections?

Do your relationships often feel superficial and lack substance? Lately, have you been having trouble:

• Navigating the dating scene and trying to find your person?

• Building friendships that are deep, lasting, and enriching?

• Fitting in at a new workplace or new university?

Maybe you’ve been successful in other ways—you have a steady job, you get along with your peers and colleagues—but deep down you feel lonely and disconnected. Your relationships just don’t have the depth you’re looking for, and you don’t feel like you can completely be yourself around the people in your current friend group.

Perhaps you go on lots of first dates, but can’t seem to go any farther than that, leading you to wonder: Am I doing something wrong? What am I missing? Why can’t I build connections as easily as other people? As a result, maybe you’re thinking of seeing a relationship therapist. 

Your Circle May Have Grown Smaller And Smaller Over Time 

There may have been a time in your life when you had lots of friends and you never had to think twice about how to find them. But now that you’re older, your circle may be smaller. Old friendships may have faded out of your life, especially if you’ve moved or recently retired. Perhaps your partner passed away, and you’re realizing how much of your social life revolved around them—it feels like you’re having to start life over from scratch. 

On the other hand, you may have adult children that you’re struggling to get along with. Maybe you were looking forward to being a grandparent, but you’ve found that it’s harder than you thought to connect with your grandkids because of strained relationships with your kids. 

Whether your relationship challenges are romantic, platonic, familial, or work-related, I’m confident that my approach to therapy can help. My mission is to help you improve your relationship-building skills and create connections that lift you up and empower you to be the person you were always meant to be.

Here In Tucson, Arizona, Many People Feel Like A Complete Unknown

It’s no secret that relationships are hard to come by in this area. Many young people move here to attend college, only to realize how hard it is to fit in in a totally new landscape. Additionally, there’s a large retirement community here that faces the same struggle. Many retirees come from New York, New Jersey, California, and other areas of the country that are crawling with people. They’re not always prepared for the vast desert that is Arizona.

Oftentimes, couples will move here post-retirement and seem to have a plan for the future all mapped out. Then one partner will pass away, and suddenly the other person finds that they’re completely on their own. They’re not only widowed, but also thousands of miles from their kids and their grandchildren. On top of that, they’re having emotional challenges they’ve never faced before, and they may not be used to talking about their emotions. 

Little wonder, then, that there’s a growing need for relationship therapy both in the Tucson area and in the wider culture. Many people, young and old, are struggling to build meaningful communities. The issue is especially prevalent in the digital age, when we are surrounded by screens 24/7 and so many of our connections are online rather than face-to-face. 

Creating relationships that last can feel like rocket science—and that’s where therapy comes into play, offering guidance and hope for those seeking deeper connections. 

Therapy Can Help You Build Relationships That Empower You To Be Your Best Self

If you’re reading this page, chances are you have an inkling of hope—however small—that believes that the relationships you want are attainable. I’m here to speak to that part of you and say yes, reminding you of your own resilience and empowering you with new techniques for building and sustaining meaningful relationships, be they romantic, platonic, work-related, etc. 

The first step in building better relationships is forming a better relationship with yourself. In sessions together, you and I will explore questions like: What are your relationship values? What kind of qualities do you look for in someone else? What were the common denominators in past relationships that didn’t work out? What can you change going forward to ensure that you don’t repeat the same mistakes? 

Answering these questions can help you hold a mirror up to your needs, desires, and challenges. The goal of therapy is to turn inward, looking within you to acknowledge the individual role you play in your relationships and understand why certain issues seem to repeat themselves from one relationship to the next. This way, the focus is on the ways you find it hard to make connections versus turning therapy into a blame game about what others have done wrong.

Tailoring My Approach To Relationship Counseling 

Because relationship issues are complex, my approach to relationship counseling differs depending upon the kind of relationship you are seeking help for (i.e. dating, friendship, family relationships, coworkers, colleagues).  

Whatever the case may be for you here is a list of interventions I generally use: 

• Psychoeducation from a psychodynamic/psychoanalytic perspective to help you understand the other person better. 

• CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) to help you learn how to catch your negative thoughts and reduce the anxiety and fear you might experience because of stressful relationship dynamics. 

• Communication Skills to learn how to effectively communicate your feelings. You can learn how to respond in a genuinely empathic manner, and role-play helps to practice these new responses.

• Mentalization Based Treatment, an evidenced based approach that sharpens your ability to recognize how your skewed perception causes emotional dysregulation.

In the end, there’s probably nothing you want more than to have friendships where you feel accepted and understood and romantic relationships where you feel loved and adored for who you are. Making such connections isn’t easy, but with willingness, readiness, and a desire for change, I believe there’s nothing you can’t accomplish, especially when you have the support of a caring and compassionate relationship therapist.

You May Have Some Questions About Relationship Therapy…

How will I know who my people are? 

The first step in answering this question is figuring out who you are and what’s important to you. Counseling can help you explore the qualities you find most attractive in others and assess whether or not you have those qualities yourself. For many people, hobbies and interests are the gateway into community, but this isn’t always the case, as the answer is different for everyone. Therapy is a chance to find your own unique path toward community.

Can I really learn to build connections with other people?

Yes, you can. It doesn’t always happen easily or overnight, but therapy can serve as the jumping-off point for building new connections. As your counselor, I will give you skills for communicating more effectively and approaching others even when it may seem daunting, leading to more opportunities for meaningful relationships. 

What if other people judge me for needing to see a therapist?

Since therapy is confidential, you don’t have to share about your time in therapy with anyone else in your life. That said, I would challenge you to consider that other people’s judgment of you doesn’t ultimately matter. When you’re willing to pursue your own path regardless of what other people think, you’re likely to find yourself surrounded by people who have your best interests in mind and understand who you are on a deeper level.

Building Community Isn’t Easy. That’s Why I’m Here. 

Whether you want help navigating the dating scene, building closer friendships, or finding a romantic partner that’s right for you, I’m confident that my approach to relationship therapy can help. To learn more about the counseling services I offer, I encourage you to fill out the contact form. I look forward to working with you!

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