Communication is a foundational component of our daily lives. We are social beings and thrive on feeling connected.
During conversations, we all want to feel heard and understood. Unfortunately, there is also a challenge that many of us face with our communication habits. While often good at speaking, we sometimes struggle with reciprocating effective listening skills, especially when it comes to conflict resolution.
In order to establish healthy communication habits, active listening is an important skill. More than just mere listening, active listening is a skill that needs to be practiced.
What Is Active Listening?
Active listening involves a deeper engagement with the person you are speaking with. It requires you to be more present and helps both participants find a better meaning and understanding with each other.
So often during a conversation, we hear what the other person is saying, but also begin forming our own response before they stop speaking. In regards to conflict, we want to hurry up and offer some type of resolution or suggestion to help fix the situation. While this may seem helpful, it can cause misunderstanding and missed information.
Active listening is a skill that will make you more attentive to not only your conversations, but to the person and their situation as well. Once you can implement this ability to truly listen, you should notice an improvement in the quality of your dialogue.
Key Components of Active Listening
Attention
While having a conversation, give the other person your undivided attention. This is a good way to indicate active listening. There are countless ways that we can become distracted, whether there are phones, other people around, TVs, you name it. Making eye contact and avoiding distractions is key. Just be mindful of how you give eye contact because too much can feel uncomfortable or awkward.
Non-Verbal Cues
A large percentage of communication comes from non-verbal cues. Your body language should match your level of attentiveness. It will convey more about your thoughts and feelings to the other person than your words may in some instances. Avoid crossing your arms, lean in, smile, and nod your head when in agreement.
Reflection
One great way to show an understanding of the information provided to you is to paraphrase what the other person said before interjecting your own thoughts. Reflection gives you the opportunity to further show your attention, but also allows you to clarify anything that may have been missed or confused.
Ask Open-Ended Questions
Open-ended questions are more engaging than your typical yes/no questions. These will show interest and encourage the other person to be more elaborative and work through things on their own end.
Be Empathetic
Being open and honest can leave you in a vulnerable state. Validate the other person’s feelings by acknowledging their emotions. Sometimes the other person wants to feel heard and understood more than they want to receive feedback.
The Importance of Active Listening
Active listening may be a skill that seems obvious and easy, but it is often one that is overlooked in the moment as the level of effort it requires is underestimated.
Implementing active listening in conversation will help establish and build trust within the relationship. This applies to partners, friends, family, colleagues, and general acquaintances.
Active listening is paramount for proper conflict resolution. It allows you both to find a mutually beneficial solution and prevents any miscommunication. Through this, you can also work to prevent future issues.
Finally, it can be empowering to building more confidence during difficult situations.
If you find yourself struggling with your communication habits, you may find counseling services to be beneficial. Effective communication is something I use every day during sessions and can teach you how to effectively implement these skills into your daily life. Reach out to schedule a session for relationship therapy today!